If I sit on the sofa for a couple more years
spend all my money on porno and beers
I know you'd still like me, but what would you say
would you still find me sexually attractive?
Would you still find me sexually attractive
if I gained fifty pounds, fired off a few rounds
from the armchair of life I'd call you my wife
if you still found me sexually attractive
If I stopped taking showers and combing my hair
left empty bottles of filth everywhere
made up religions and called myself God
would you still find me sexually attractive?
Would you still find me sexually attractive
If I dressed all in furs and used racial slurs?
At the point of a knife, I'd call you my wife
if you still found me sexually attractive
If I stopped smoking reefer and combin' my hair
stuck "Pave The Rainforest" on the back of my car
started listening to Rush Limbaugh and believing that crap
would you still find me sexually attractive?
Would you still find me sexually attractive
If I sat on my tush and voted for Bush
a Republican life but I'd call you my wife
if you still found me sexually attractive
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